Integrating,Your,Freedoms,Part DIY Integrating Your 4 Freedoms (Part 8 of 9) - Mate Relationshi
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Integration in a Mate Relationship A materelationship is a superlative setting for integrating your FourFreedoms. A relationship is the ideal arena for learning to becomewhole. Lovers do not complete each other but rather comprise one wholerelationship. Not only is committed relationship a testing ground forconfronting issues of personal and spiritual growth, it also provides asecure haven in which to do so. In its cocoon, you can cultivatepleasure and explore desire. One of the most powerful choicesyou can make on your path to total freedom is to select yourrelationship as the most important thing in your life. When you makethis choice, your relationship becomes a spiritual practice. Threeessential qualities of a relationship as spiritual practice arecommitment, fidelity, and time. In a relationship covenant, commitmentaffirms your intention to grow old together. Monogamy provides thesecurity you need to risk being emotionally vulnerable and transparent,so you can open the door to a shared sexual/spiritual ecstasy. Spendinglovers time together feeds the relationship through such simpleactivities as daily gazing into each others eyes, sending love backand forth, and taking a weekly block of hours to be lovers. Asyou engage in the intimacies of a relationship, as you learn theknowledge and skills to become fit for a relationship, you willnaturally call upon, activate, and reinforce your Four Freedoms. Nomatter how irrelevant or frightening a particular freedom can seem, itis essential to embrace each of them, because they all interact subtlyin an infinite number of ways. Synchronizing, integrating, and bringingthe Four Freedoms (Body, Mind, Heart, and Soul) into harmony are someof the most important tasks you can possibly undertake. Your health,well-being, and happiness depend upon harmonization. The Four Freedomsare optional, not mandatory. It is your responsibility to reclaim andembrace your Freedoms. Embrace all your Four Freedoms Reclaimingyour Four Freedoms is not particularly difficult. You do not have tosearch for where to find them, for they reside within you. You do nothave to earn them, because they are your birthright. You do not have todeserve them, because they wait to be claimed in the lost-and-foundroom where you have forgotten that you left them. The essence of Body Freedomis direct sensory experience of what you see, hear, taste, smell, andtouch in the now moment. To reclaim Body Freedom, adopt a pleasureorientation. Touch, make love, learn the art of sacred sex, and setaside shame associated with your body, sex, and experiencing pleasure.Love yourself, love your mate, love life. The essence of Mind Freedomis consciousness. The responsibility of Mind Freedom is to exercise twokinds of choices. The first is what you think about, your attention.The second is how you think, your intention. You can choose to payattention to what you want, rather than what you dont want. Thesubject of your attention becomes a choiceyou are saying that you wantmore of it. You can think about what you want in a consistentlypositive way. Then you must take action to support your thoughts. The essence of Heart Freedomis emotion, the capacity to feel. The supreme emotion is love, which byits very nature implies a relationship, the lover and the beloved. Theresponsibility of Heart Freedom is to allow yourself to feeleverything, both positive and negative, and, in addition, to act inspite of emotional discomfort. Your challenge is to repeatedly openyour heart every time it closes. The essence of Soul Freedomis faith. In spiritual matters, faith is what you believe even in spiteof evidence to the contrary. With faith you know that however bad thecurrent situation is, something better is just around the corner. Theresponsibility of Soul Freedom includes the necessity to take action infaith, regardless of how hopeless the situation might appear. Excerpted from our new book Sensual Love Secrets for Couples: The Four Freedoms of Body, Mind, Heart and Soul, by Al Link and Pala Copeland, Llewellyn, 2007.
Integrating,Your,Freedoms,Part