Joining,Fraternities,and,Soror family Joining Fraternities and Sororities, Part II- The Recent Tru

Raising a family can be challenging and stressful at times. However, the common goals and emotional, financial, and physical investments made can be a common bond between husband and wife. One that compliments their marriage relationship.Of A lot of women avoid wearing nice clothes when they getpregnant because they believe that they look fat or ugly. You know that there’snothing more beautiful than a pregnant woman glowing and smiling, so youshouldn’t hide your body during p

All parents believe that their son or daughter would never be involved in making a bad choice that would make them and their actions the subject of national headlines. But it happens and once the damage is done, we ask ourselves what we could have done to prevent this from ever happening. I have to ask, did you talk to your son or daughter before they landed at college, or at the very least before they joined that campus social group? Talk of issues that these groups continuously find themselves in the middle of? Well maybe not enough, life is busy, preparing for college is hard, or there are only a few incidents each year, the chance percentage of my son or daughter being involved is quite low, these are some of the answers I imagine. All true, but common sense is best when used as the bases of all decisions, and so often our actions are a combination of steps which build into a crescendo where the worst last minute choices become the quickest made, with the least amount of thought given to the answers. As we review the last few months of campus news, parents take note on subjects your teenagers should be aware of, that happened because someone like them didn’t think it would happen to them, but it did.One of the biggest bombshells that happened since I wrote my article, was the deflation of the Playboy November 2014 article on the alleged rape in a fraternity house on the campus of the University of Virginia, which had supposedly happened in 2012. Very bad journalism was exampled by only interviewing the victim, and not any collaborating witnesses (like her friends who she had spoken to after the incident), caused this retraction of this story by Playboy. But on the initial positive side, this story had blown to national headlines causing the university to exam its’ history. In which it became public knowledge that since 1998, 183 students were expelled for honor code violations like cheating on exams, but no one had been expelled for sexual assault. This case had raised awareness but now it might be harder to believe the next victim who comes forward. The University of Virginia historically does not respond well to victims of sexual assault. In fact last May (2012), the US Department of Education had released a list of 55 colleges and Universities under investigation over possible violations in their handling of sexual violence and harassment complaints. By October that list had grown to 86 schools.Racial slurs are a constant problem on college campuses, as anyone can find with a simple internet search. The story hit big when some Oklahoma University fraternity members where caught in a video on a bus singing a racial song mentioning lynching. Universities are taking a no tolerance policy suspending students and dissolving fraternities, but that is heavily contingent on the strength of the evidence. Some of the latest cases (2015- The Journal of Blacks in Higher Education), involve the University of South Carolina; State University of New York- Purchase; Duke; University of Washington; American University; Connecticut College; Lincoln University; University of Alabama; Wheaton College; and Bucknell University. Some incidents are just students putting on skits that represent KKK members; or graffiti found on campus, with slurs and swastikas; or rope tied in nooses, left in public view. Some are similar to my experience on campus 40 years ago, calls shouted out from an open window in a dorm building to anyone walking by. We all have to be onboard that racial slurs hurt, they reflect an uglier time when most men and women thought they were privileged over their fellow human beings. These are signs that we are still struggling with our past.And then there is the fact that drinking is against the law for under aged college students, yet these students, as well as of aged students die every year on campuses. Compelledtoact.com list 22 fall semester (2014) campus deaths related to alcohol around the country. They suggest there may be as much as three times more, however the media reports of their deaths are unclear of the connection to alcohol. My alma mater Rutgers University started a policy that bans fraternities and sororities from serving any alcohol at their house parties for the rest of the 2015 school year. They can still have their spring formals and other events with alcohol off campus. But they must be served by a third party licensed vendor. This comes after a student died of alcohol intoxication in September, after her friends took her from a fraternity house to the hospital. And in November a second fraternity member wound up in the hospital after drinking heavily. In March after an investigation, his fraternity was shut down. Out of 86 fraternities and sororities on Rutgers’ campus, six fraternities and one sorority still remain under review for alcohol violations. Parents, students, Universities, fraternities, and sororities, need to continue to do more, any death from alcohol intoxication on a college campus, is one too many.In their defense, some fraternities and sororities have now formed an organization to combat sexual misconduct, binge drinking, and hazing. With 75,000 members on 550 campuses, they believe that through preventive strategies they can improve the health and wellbeing of their members and their campus communities. Statistics show one in five women will be sexually assaulted while attending college. This group believes they are in the right place to address sexual misconduct, assaults, and relationship violence prevention. We need to remember that most fraternities and sororities focus on positive social activities and try to lead by example in their communities. There are a few bad apples that grab the headlines in very bad ways, tarnishing everyone’s image. Let us hope this group can accomplish its’ goals. Behind the University of Virginia’s internal examination this past year, lies the words of its founder Thomas Jefferson, “It is more honorable to repair a wrong than to persist in it”.