Equipping,Your,Children,for,Br family Equipping Your Children for a Bright Future: 5 Simple Rules


Raising a family can be challenging and stressful at times. However, the common goals and emotional, financial, and physical investments made can be a common bond between husband and wife. One that compliments their marriage relationship.Of A lot of women avoid wearing nice clothes when they getpregnant because they believe that they look fat or ugly. You know that there’snothing more beautiful than a pregnant woman glowing and smiling, so youshouldn’t hide your body during p


Normal 0 MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;mso-style-noshow:yes;mso-style-parent:"";mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt;mso-para-margin:0in;mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-pagination:widow-orphan;font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Times New Roman";}When we have tobe both mother and father for our children in their primary residence it can bea challenge to know how to supply nurture, encouragement, protection andprovision in the right measures.  Our children will continue to evolvephysically, emotionally and spiritually over time and their biggest influences,in their most informative years, will come from their home environment. As parents, we can only do our best.  Remember that ‘best’ is a movingscale and that as we invest in our own development we create a bigger scope forour children to become more of who they were born to be.  Here are myfirst 5 pointers to allowing your children their greatest scope for success:1.  Model Great CommunicationTake time to be clear about what you want to say and why. My simpleststrategies are:Keep it positive, so instead of ‘don’t’ speak to me like that’, try ‘speak to me politely and you’ll get a better response’.Try to practice replacing ‘but’ with ‘and’  - it will allow your children to retain the information in the first part of the sentence (which is usually the positive part), so ‘I think you dressed yourself really well today and tomorrow I’d like you to try a little faster.’I recommend reading ‘The Gentle Art of Communicating with Kids’ by Suzette Haden Elgin 2.   Encourage an Open MindRemember that there is rarely one right way.  Take eggs: boil them, frythem, scramble them, poach them.  Take personalities: adventurous, caring,entertaining, strategic.  Take artwork: Monet, Dali, Emin or Eisner. It’s all a matter of taste, personality and preference.  Encourage yourchild to find out what’s right for them as well as what might be others’experience.  Be open to discussions around gender, race, age, ability,height, weight, beauty, culture, faith and education.  Also be aware of your own assumptions in these areas – no one way is better than another – allhave benefits and advantages.3.    Model Respect‘Treat others as you want to be treated’ is valuable advice that has existedfor generations.  If you want to be loved, then love.  If you want tobe encouraged, then encourage.  If you want to be bruise-free, don’tbruise.  Being respectful can have its challenges – especially when wedeal with our ex-partners – so practice acknowledging differences – ‘I can seethat you think differently about the children’s summer clubs.  Let methink about it’; or ‘It sounds like your faith works for you as much as mineworks for me … which is good’.  Your children will take their model forrespect and tolerance from you (initially) – giving them the best startpossible. 4.    Maintain BoundariesConsistency encourages confidence.  This applies to our homes and physicalsurroundings, our ability to handle a new school or work place, ourunderstanding of how to ‘be’ around other people (family, friends, workcolleagues and relatives).  Once we learn the rules we can practicesucceeding within them.  With children, this means being consistent with messagesof affirmation, rules at mealtimes, routines around home-time, bath and bed,standards of politeness and respect.  Keeping these things consistent,even when we’re feeling sensitive and challenged ourselves will pay off in theend. 5.    Encourage Responsibility for RelationshipsIt’s all very easy, especially when our children are little, to intercede intheir relationships.  This includes us stepping in to resolvedisagreements with friends over toys, communicating with their teacher withregard to behavior and taking their side in a conversation with their otherparent.  There’s a difference between taking over a situation andequipping our children to learn from a situation.  Again, for an easierlife, I recommend putting some effort into the latter.

Equipping,Your,Children,for,Br

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