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TEST YOUR PROFESSIONAL BEHAVIORby Gerri D SmithCopyright 2004Word Count - 821“Professionalism is a skill that must be practiced to be mastered; it does not need to be explained to yourself or others – it just is.”It’s natural not to be understood all the time, and it’s natural for you to not understand others all the time. When you set yourself up to understand everything that’s said or done to you, most of the time you will be disappointed. There isn’t any way you can accurately predict and interpret another person’s words, feelings and emotions, or their deepest thoughts, simply because no two people think alike.Learn to overlook some things that you don’t fully understand. For instance, when you interact with someone whose attitude or behavior is irritating to you, learn to ignore the behavior. If the action toward you is not harmful, then ignore it. Then you won’t become a victim of the unpleasant behavior. Or, if you choose to, and can handle the conflict, you can seek an explanation from the person whose behavior is distasteful to you.Also, you can test your professionalism when placed in an unpleasant or an offensive situation by either walking away or, quietly commanding yourself to smile. This deflects the hurt, and erases the need to feel that you’ve been treated unfairly. This is a good test to practice and master.In many business transactions, there may be times when you won’t approve of a customer’s behavior or language. Most of the time, the rude behavior has nothing to do with you. So, you can disregard it. Otherwise, you’ll see your emotional strings getting pulled every time. Observe your own behavior as you interact with others. Make certain you are not guilty of any of the unprofessional habits listed below:* ARGUING – Disagreeing, quarrelling, or being in conflict with another. Arguments begin when there is a misunderstanding. Whenever your words or actions cause another to experience feelings of embarrassment or humiliation, or when you participate in an argument that leads to the other person being treated unfairly, you are acting in an unprofessional manner. Arguments are not normal behaviors. They are self-defeating attitudes that may elevate your blood pressure and your stress level. Arguments tend to upset both participants. Instead of arguing, try to help and/or support the other person’s view. Agree to disagree – you keep your opinion, and let the other person keep theirs.* LYING – Being deceitful, dishonest, and insincere. How many people do you know who tell the truth all of the time and at all costs? Take a look at yourself, your associates, your family, and anyone you interact with – even your not-so-favorite people. In some situations, this unprofessional behavior may be very narrowly defined and may depend upon the circumstances.In some cases, it makes sense to avoid lying when you know that the truth will be damaging. You must then evaluate your principles. Are your values more important than the person you’re helping? However, when your words are meant to conceal the truth, or to destroy relationships, or another’s character, it is not a professional behavior.* DOMINEERING –A feeling of superiority, overbearing, forceful, or showing offensive behavior toward others. Developing a need to dominate or to be accepted based upon your own self-importance is another self-defeating attitude. Professional behavior is never having a need to prove that you are superior to anyone else. Whenever you depend upon the attention of others, or when you develop a need to be noticed, you set yourself up for constant gratification and expectation for approval. How long could you expect someone else to cater to your wishes, without the other person losing her/his own self-worth? * EXAGGERATING – Overstating; embellishing the truth, or inflating the truth. Nothing is more sacred than the integrity of your own mind. There is only one you. Know that you are unique – yet, flaunting it to the point of rubbing your uniqueness in someone else’s nose is not a sign of professionalism. * JUDGING – A way of comparing yourself to others. You are guilty of sitting in judgment of others when you display any of the following positions: 1. “I’m more attractive than she is.” 2 “My accomplishments and goals are more important than yours.” 3. “My business is better than the one down the street.” 4. I can do ____________(Fill in the blank) better than anybody else.5. My house is bigger and more expensive than my co-worker; my business partner, my brother, etc. When your way of thinking is based on your opinion and is not based on fact or the truth, the behavior is unprofessional.Look closely at yourself and your own aspirations, then learn to appreciate the fact that your life need not be built upon comparing yourself to others, exaggerating and/or lying to others, or feeling that you’re superior. Instead, with your built-in spiritual nature, make your life one that is pleasing to others, fulfilling to yourself, and – exceedingly professional###