all,share,one,ultimate,goal,li DIY We all share one ultimate goal in life: Understand this and

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The next time you complain about someone or get upset withthe way they are, do yourself a favor; stop and think about what I’m sharinghere, instead. Here’s a way of thinking that you can adopt to help yousee things in a healthier light. And when you see things in a healthier light,your life will flow in a positive direction.  So here goes. On the surface, we’re all quite different from oneanother. For the most part, we may have different goals and different ways ofachieving them. We go through different relationships in hopes to find thepeople who are most compatible with us. We try different work to find one thatmost suits us. We explore different things to see what most complement ourinterests.  Along the way we may find things that once interest us nowno longer fit into our lives. We’re constantly learning, growing and evolving. Some ofus do this faster than others – eager to know more, do more, be more, havemore. And there are others who are too afraid of change and rather settle onhaving learned enough. And then there are those who settle between these twoextremes. Whatever the case, my point is this: Though we may allseem different on the surface, we do, however, share the same ultimate desire. Thisdesire is the driving force that causes each of us to do what we do. The desireis... to be happy. We could argue that it is fulfillment or wealth that we’rereally after; or that it is joy, understanding, love, peace, power, or evenhealth. But it really doesn’t matter how you describe it; these are all just differentforms of the “ultimate goal” – to experience “happiness.” That’s what it allboils down to. No matter how “right” or “wrong” we get, “good” or “bad,”we’re all just trying to find some form of happiness. Think about it; thinkabout everything you’ve done. What was the ultimate feeling you were trying to achieve? Whether you were having an argument with a loved one,working towards a goal, lying your way out of a situation, trying to make moremoney, you have your reasons. But no matter how you look at those reasons, thebottom line is: you want to experience some form of happiness – be itfulfillment, accomplishment, love or importance. On our quest to find happiness, most of us can act in waysthat don’t appear to support our ultimate goal of being happy. We fight,complain, compete, yell, belittle, blame, lie, manipulate and plain olddisrespect. Is this really the way to achieve happiness? I think we can agreethat they don’t sound like behaviors that promote or complement happy.  If we want to be happy, shouldn’t we be leaning moretoward behaviors that are in alignment with happy? Such as patience, understanding, compassion, honest communication,gratitude, kindness, non-judgement… (you get the picture). Saying this, however, I want to be clear that it’s okay tofeel negative emotions and act out negative human behaviors. It is normal. Itis natural. These feelings and behaviors serve a purpose. They are the thingsthat trigger pain in order to help us learn, grow and do better.  These negativities, if you will, are just as much a partof you as the positivities. It is in accepting both your light and dark sidesthat makes you complete. You can’t be complete if you only know one spectrum ofyourself and not the other; you can’t truly know happiness if you’ve never feltits opposite, or know what works for you if you’ve never experienced the thingsthat don’t.  One side of you cannot truly exist without the other. Andso it is that we have all these qualities within us, light and dark, that surfacedepending on what’s happening around and within us. And it is from theseexperiences of both light and dark that we can choose what suits us best, andhow we want to live. As Dr. Deepak Chopra would say: “When we are willing toembrace both the light and the dark sides of our selves, we can begin to healboth our selves and our relationships.” (Dr. Chopra is a world-renownedauthority in the field of mind-body healing, best-selling author, and a globalforce in the field of human empowerment.) Though these “negative” feelings and behaviors are well inorder to serve their purpose for existence, however, they can be a hindrance ifwe don’t learn from them and move on. They can’t serve us well when we chooseto dwell in them for an extended period of time – when we let them drown usinto more darkness rather than use them to realize more light.  Even though we all ultimately want to achieve happiness,the choices each of us make and the path we take to get there are not going tobe the same. So we will run into people who we will have much in common withand agree with, just as we will also run into others we don't agree with. The ones we don’t agree with, we have a tendency to judgeor even condemn. Deep down we want to think we’re better. We point out whythey’re wrong so we can prove how we’re right. But here’s where I want toremind you that there’s really no “need” for you to do this.  You see, when you spend your time judging or complaining,you’re truly hurting yourself because you’re putting your energy in the wrongplaces, therefore, your life cannot flow. Ever noticed people who spend timecomplaining about others are also the very same people whose life isn’t flowingsmoothly?  When you understand that we’re all working toward the sameultimate goal of finding happiness – and that each of us have our own set ofchallenges along the way that cause us to act or react the way we do – you canhave a little more compassion and patience toward others.  You will understand that they, too, in their own way –regardless of how they may appear on the surface – are having a hard timefinding a balance between their light and dark sides. You don’t have to agree with the way they are, but you nowunderstand that life challenges affect everyone differently. Some may evenchoose to react in an “evil” way and some, not so much. Whatever the case, ithelps not to judge anyone. After all, we all do share something powerful incommon – we all just want to be happy.So what’s there to judge, really?  So don’t be too concerned with other people’s path andlife challenges. Do not waste energy condemning or criticizing. Instead, movealong with class and civility while focusing on your own journey. This willsave you more energy to focus on emotions that will contribute to what you needto do rather than take away from it.  Should you adopt this way of thinking, you’ll experienceyour life to flow more in your favor. And things that begin to happen to youmay even feel miraculous. But you’ll soon learn that those “miraculous” thingsthat are happening are not so much the result of miracles as they are theresult of your deliberate intention to adopt a healthier way of thinking. In closing, I’ll leave you with more words of wisdom fromworld-renowned author and leader of human empowerment, Dr. Deepak Chopra: “Intention springs from our deepest desires, and thosedesires are shaped by karma. You and I don’t have the same karma; therefore wedon’t have exactly the same desires. We have loved different people, knelt atdifferent graves, prayed at different altars. The specifics of desire areunique to each of us. Yet if you follow the chain of desire, in the end we areall the same. We want to be happy. We want to be fulfilled. We want meaning andpurpose in our lives. We want a sense of connection with God or spirit.  We want other people to respect us and love us. And wewant to feel safe. These desires are universal. But the route each of us takesto satisfy them is uniquely our own, based on our individual experiences andmemories, or karma. We’re all heading for the same destination, but we takedifferent roads. We arrive together, having traveled our different paths.”